Writing Tips (#TuesdayTips)
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TuesdayTips169
I Sentence You …
Sentencing Guidelines.
For today’s #TuesdayTip, I want to look at the topic of sentencing.
Caveat: I am NOT a legal expert, so bear that in mind when reading the following.
For the vast majority of crime novels, the culprit is caught and convicted, and sent to jail. In the UK, if they committed murder, they will have received a mandatory life sentence. Generally speaking, that’s about as much detail as the writer will include.
But sometimes you want more. Perhaps you’d like to state how long your antagonist will go to jail for? Perhaps they previously served time in jail and had been released – in which case what were they in for, and how long did they serve? Were they released on licence or is their original sentence spent? A mandatory life sentence comes with a minimum tariff to be served before they can be considered for parole. How is that decided?
Needless to say, determining a sentence is a complex and controversial process. Most writers have limited legal expertise, but want their stories to ring true. So how can you find out what is an appropriate sentence for your character?
The Basics:- All jurisdictions have their own rules and often their own terminology.
In the UK, England & Wales follow the same guidelines, whilst Scotland and Northern Ireland have their own legal systems. So first of all, ensure that you understand the requirements of your jurisdiction (Scotland differs from England & Wales for example by having a fifteen person jury, rather than twelve, and the prosecutor is the Procurator Fiscal, rather than the Crown Prosecution Service).
- If you are writing a book set in the US, the law is a patchwork quilt of Federal (country-wide), State and even county. You will need to figure out whose jurisdiction your offender falls under (a combination of location and type of offence).
The law and sentencing guidelines change and evolve – make sure you consider the time in which your story is set.
For the purposes of this article, I am going to stick with what I know best, modern-day England & Wales.- First, check if your crime would be dealt with by a Magistrate Court or a Crown Court.
- As a rule of thumb, Magistrates deal with offences that would ordinarily be dealt with by fines, community service or short custodial sentences. There is no jury. They will also determine if the accused should be committed for a jury trial in the Crown Court. This link to the Sentencing Council lists the sort of offences that a magistrate may deal with.
https://www.sentencingcouncil.org.uk/offences/
- Some charges carry potential sentences that are outside the remit of the magistrates court and so should be committed to a jury trial in a crown court. Other offences can be triable either way – in other words the magistrate can either deal with it or send to the crown court. This link to the Sentencing Council lists the sort of offences that a crown court may deal with.
https://www.sentencingcouncil.org.uk/crown-court/
Notice that the list of offences is very similar, reflecting how many crimes are triable either way, depending on the circumstances and severity. However, there are some obvious differences: Attempted murder is only dealt with by the crown court, for example.
OK, so what now?
As a writer, you probably want a sentence that is broadly plausible and ideally fits the needs of your story (somebody convicted of murder isn’t going to be back on the street in six years unless their conviction is quashed. You need to either change the timelines in your story, or consider having them convicted of manslaughter or wounding with intent).
You basically have three options:
1) contact a solicitor or relevant legal professional and ask them how long they think your character would get (or work backwards – I want my character to go to prison for this long, what aggravating or mitigating circumstances would mean that length of sentence is plausible?). There are some Facebook groups where there may be experts willing to advise writers – just remember to specify where and when it is set and also read the answers carefully. Despite clearly stating your book is set in the UK, a lot of Americans will still chip in and recommend the death penalty, then start waffling on about plea deals and other such nonsense.
2) Search the internet for similar cases (check the dates, in case the law has changed since the real-life offence was committed) and see what sort of sentence was handed down. Assuming that there are no unusual aggravating or mitigating circumstances, you can probably just have your fictional character receive a similar sentence.
3) Look up the range of sentencing options on the Sentencing Council Website.
Despite what the tabloids would have you believe, judges actually follow a strict set of guidelines. Obviously, it requires an experienced judge to evaluate each case on its individual merits, but it will give a set of principles for them to follow.
Basically, each crime would have a ‘starting point‘.- From there the judge must consider aggravating factors (things that increase the severity of the crime and thus the sentence) and mitigating circumstances (things that may decrease the severity of the crime and therefore the sentence). You sometimes hear about defence teams giving pleas in mitigation, which is their professional duty (however they or society may feel about the person and/or crime).
- Offenders are also given credit for a guilty plea, on a sliding scale, with a hefty reduction for admitting it at the first opportunity, to a lesser reduction for pleading guilty at the last moment (perhaps after the trial has already started).
- Time spent remanded in custody awaiting their trial (time spent) should also be considered.
- Should multiple sentences be served concurrently (at the same time) or consecutively (one after another)? This is another complex subject, but the principles are here https://www.sentencingcouncil.org.uk/overarching-guides/crown-court/item/totality/
What about release?
First of all, prisoners must serve their whole sentence. However, they don’t have to spend it all in prison. Typically, unless the judge has specified a minimum tariff (as in a life sentence), the prisoner is eligible for release halfway through. Then they will be released on licence to serve the remainder of the sentence in the community. The licence comes with rules, and if they breach those rules they will be recalled to prison, to potentially serve the remainder of their original sentence behind bars.
Life Sentences – an exception to the above.
Life sentences are mandatory for those convicted of murder, and can be given in some other extremely serious situations, such as rape or terrorism offences, if the judge feels it is justified.
Life sentences are slightly different to other offences. In these cases, the sentence lasts for the rest of the prisoner’s life. However, unlike other offences, where the prisoner is automatically released at the half-way point, the judge will set a minimum tariff that must be served behind bars before the prisoner can be considered for release by the parole board. If they are successful (and many aren’t on their first attempt) they will be released under strict licencing conditions, which they have to follow for the rest of their life. They can be recalled to prison to serve more time if they breach those conditions. The sentencing act 2020 lays out the guidelines in legislation here:
In exceptional circumstances, a judge can specify a whole-life tariff, where the prisoner will never be released. There are only 60 or so prisoners currently serving those sentences. You can probably guess which scumbags they are.
What are your thoughts on accuracy regarding sentencing in fiction? Do you know of any clearer websites that break down the guidelines further?
As always, feel free to comment here or on social media.
Until next time, all the best, Paul.
If you are a writer with a tip to share, or fancy writing a fictional interview between you and one of your characters, please feel free to email me.
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TuesdayTips168
Block Buster
Ideas To Thwart Writer’s Block
What 3 Words
Today’s #TuesdayTip is a great way to generate word prompts for a creative writing piece.
What3Words.com is a revolutionary way of pinpointing a precise location anywhere on the earth’s surface. Rather than trying to rely on the vagaries of describing a place using street names and postcodes (which are subject to change and in some apps, simply wrong!) the makers of the service have divided the planet into 3 metre x 3 metre squares and assigned each a permanent, unique ‘address’ consisting of three random words.
The beauty of the system is that it allows the precise identification of a location, such as a doorway or entrance, or even the middle of a field!
Emergency services all over the world have adopted it, since you can easily pinpoint the precise position of a casualty, rather than relying on the caller describing their location. It works using GPS (which all smart phones have) and once you’ve installed the app, no further data connection is required – so as long as you are in a reasonably clear location and your phone can get a GPS satellite signal, it will tell you the unique combination of three words that identify your location.
You can also use their website to find a place and retrieve its 3 words. This is what I suggest you do today. For safety reasons, if you are going to make your story publicly available DO NOT USE YOUR HOME ADDRESS! Instead, why not find the 3 Words associated with your favourite landmark?
For example, one of the locations overlapping The Louvre Museum in Paris is ///seasons.sharper.scan
So there are my three word prompts. Now can I incorporate all three words into a short written piece?
Remember the rules:- Set yourself a time limit.
- Write without stopping, editing or overthinking.
- Write whatever comes to mind and don’t worry if it doesn’t make sense.
- It doesn’t matter if it has nothing to do with the scene that you are stuck on.
If you are a writer with a tip to share, or fancy writing a fictional interview between you and one of your characters, please feel free to email me.
Until next time,
Paul
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TuesdayTips167
Attributing More.
Revisiting Dialogue Tags.
Today’s #TuesdayTip is a continuation of last week’s post [#Tip166] about Dialogue Attribution, the words outside the speech marks that tell the reader who is speaking and how they are saying it.
As mentioned previously, dialogue attribution should be unobtrusive. For example the word ‘said’ is largely invisible to readers.
One of the biggest issues is knowing who is speaking – this is relatively straight forward if there are only two people. You can ditch attribution and just alternate between them, with a line-break each time.
But for lengthy exchanges, there needs to be a periodic reminder of who is talking, in case the reader loses track.
And remember to attribute if there is an intervening section of prose – who starts speaking first after an interlude?
(There are a couple of well-known authors who can be guilty of skipping the tags entirely in fast-paced exchanges. The characters alternate speaking like a volley in a tennis match. Unfortunately, if there are no distinguishing verbal traits to differentiate the characters, I have sometime found myself stopping and having to go back and mentally assign each line of dialogue to the relevant character, which ruins the flow of the scene).
It is essential to proof read the dialogue. Come back to it after a few weeks, or use beta readers and see if they lose track.
Methods for using attribution.
You can avoid stating that a person has started speaking by tagging dialogue to a character’s action. This is called a ‘beat’.
Warren looked over his shoulder. “Are you coming, or what?”
Keep the dialogue and beat in the same line with no line-break, and the reader will automatically realise who the dialogue belongs to. Again, some writers can be guilty of adding line-breaks to separate the action from the words (a good device to add tension or adjust pacing), but without a tag to tell the reader that the same person is speaking, the reader will assume it is someone else.
Another way to signpost who is speaking without tags is distinctive language for each character. Unfortunately, this isn’t always possible. Two cops, who come from entirely different parts of the country with different dialects, might nevertheless use the same language when discussing a case. Unfortunately, there are few easy ways to render their accent and dialogue on the page, unlike in an audio production where it is obvious to the reader when the narrator has switched to Scouse, rather than Irish.
Don’t say my name!
In real-life, we use each other’s names sparingly. Especially if there are only two people present. I can chat to my wife all night without either of us using the other’s name. Even in small groups, body language etc can mean that there is no need to address someone by their name; it’s obvious who we are speaking to. In the UK especially, we are famous for being introduced to someone, then weeks later, realising that we can’t remember their name, since we haven’t used it since. There are people I’ve known for years that I chat to whenever I meet them, but couldn’t tell you their name if you asked! Our American cousins are typically better than Brits, in part because they subconsciously use a person’s name repeatedly after meeting them for the first time, imprinting it in their memory. In the UK, ‘Hello, mate, how are you doing?’ would be a typical greeting! After a while, you’ve known a person so long it would be embarrassing to ask them their name again.
You can avoid using a name, by using pronouns for a couple eg he said/she said. Modern usage controversially means ‘they’ is now a non-gendered pronoun, not just a plural (fun fact, this usage actually goes back centuries, so pay no heed to ‘purists’ who criticise it – they are wrong). Other languages, such as German have a neutral pronoun built in.
You can also use descriptors, eg ‘the young man said’. But be sparing, and only use them for a bit of variety.
These are just a few examples of dialogue attribution and there is much else to be said on the subject. What are your thoughts on dialogue attribution? As always feel free to comment here or on social media. I may return to this subject in future.
Until next time,
Paul
If you are a writer with a tip to share, or fancy writing a fictional interview between you and one of your characters, please feel free to email me.
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TuesdayTips166
Who Dat?
Dialogue Attribution.
A couple of years ago, I posted a series of articles about writing convincing dialogue [#Tips 89,90,91]. In a very belated follow-up, today’s blog is about dialogue attribution – in other words, marking who said what. The bit of conversation outside the speech marks.
The process of attributing dialogue is something that rarely gets the attention it deserves. Writers are often praised for their skilful use of speech. A good scribe can paint a picture of a character with just a few spoken words. They can demonstrate their emotions without needing to actually tell you how they are feeling.
Most importantly, the reader should never lose track of which character is actually doing the speaking.
But none of that is possible without support from outside the speech marks.
Yet this is rarely mentioned, in part, because if it is done properly, it is essentially invisible to the reader. That lack of visibility is something that is key to this whole topic.
All You Need Is He Said/She Said.
It has been claimed by some that these two tags are all a good writer needs. If there are more than two characters, or they are both the same gender, then ‘Bob said’, ‘Alice said’ and ‘Charlie said’ should suffice.
This seems somewhat restrictive – and probably flies in the face of what you learned in school. There, we are taught to avoid repetition at all costs, and to expand our written vocabulary using synonyms. We are also encouraged to modify our tags to highlight what the character is feeling.- “Go away,” he said.
- “Go away,” he said angrily.
- “Go away,” he said wearily.
- “Go away,” he shouted.
- “Go away,” he shouted angrily.
- “Go away,” he whispered.
- “Go away,” he whispered urgently.
These examples above show the same two words uttered in seven different ways, with the character’s delivery of them determined by the words surrounding them.
Taken out of context, the first example is impossible to render. The voice you hear in your head when reading it probably says more about what you are feeling than the character is feeling.
But that’s the point, it’s taken out of context. In a book, that dialogue would be nestled within the story. Hopefully there is enough information surrounding it that you can infer the emotion based on what else is, or has, taken place.
So why this advice?
First of all, I think it is too absolutist. There’s no question that writing that is stuffed with synonyms for ‘said’ can feel amateurish. Read the dialogue below and see how it feels.
“I don’t believe him,” said Warren.
“Me neither,” agreed Sutton.
“Oh, come on!” Hutchinson shouted, exasperated.
“No, I think you are right,” interjected Hardwick.
“I don’t trust him either,” Ruskin piped up.
“He’s done this before,” Grayson added.
“Fine, I’ll prove it,” Hutchinson huffed. “I’ll bring in the photo of Elvis holding me as a baby in Vegas.”
“Will it be as convincing as that John Lennon look-a-like your Dad told you you’d met as a kid?” asked Sutton.
“That wasn’t my fault,” grumbled Hutchinson, embarrassed. “Dad always liked a joke.”
“The date on the photo was June 1981; he died in December 1980!” Warren laughed.
“Well this photo was taken in 1975,” Hutchinson insisted triumphantly. “When he was at the height of his powers.”
The above exchange is frankly exhausting to read (and even more so to write). The word ‘said’ is used only once, with a further 10 synonyms.
In my opinion (and it is my opinion, others may disagree), writers should strive to minimise synonyms for said, but not to exclude them entirely. Their periodic use lends variety to a piece of prose.
I see nothing wrong with the occasional use of ‘he asked’ when a character has asked a question – however, the presence of a question mark should tell us that it us a query, making it slightly redundant.
Stop shouting at me!
Like many writers, I shun the use of exclamation marks where possible (see #Tip115). If you need them to tell the reader that something is dramatic, you probably haven’t written it dramatically enough. However, they can have their uses in dialogue. They can be used instead of telling the reader a character is shouting.
For example.
“Warren, come here,” Susan shouted.
I think this looks more impactful with an exclamation mark.
“Warren, come here!” shouted Susan.
If the reader already knows who is doing the shouting, then you may be able to eliminate the dialogue tag entirely.
Susan shone her torch into the darkened room. “Warren!”
Dialogue attribution is an essential tool in any writer’s arsenal. For that reason, I am going to continue this theme in a later tip.
What are your thoughts on dialogue attribution? Can you think of any good examples of it done well?Until next time.
PaulIf you are a writer with a tip to share, or fancy writing a fictional interview between you and one of your characters, please feel free to email me.
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TuesdayTips165
I See You.
Character Visibility.
Welcome to this week’s #TuesdayTip. Today, I want to look at character visibility.
Specifically, whether a character is front and centre or ‘hidden’ in the background.
In crime novels, there is usually a culprit of some description. There are also red herrings. Fans of crime fiction are often very careful readers. They are looking for clues as to who the antagonist is. I’ve discussed previously the placement of red herrings [Tip153] but sometimes you want to mislead your readers even more. You want readers to work for the pay off. One way to do this is to keep them guessing about whether the guilty party is front and centre throughout the story (hiding in plain sight) or perhaps is a smaller character, maybe one that seems to be little more than a supporting actor.
Although there are very few hard and fast rules about writing crime fiction, one thing you have to do is introduce the culprit early on – don’t cheat and bring them in two chapters from the end.
So, do you have them as a key part of the narrative, or do you slip them in barely noticed?
The same goes for red herrings. Do you make them an obvious suspect and spend most of the book making the readers guess ‘are they or aren’t they’, only to fall at the final hurdle? Or do you slip them in discreetly early on, but have them just noticeable enough that the reader starts to feel clever because they think they’ve spotted someone you are trying to hide?
Some of the best books I’ve ever read skilfully combine both approaches. A character who is so obvious that I am almost dismissing them, because surely the writer is trying to mislead me? Alongside an apparently minor character who I start to feel suspicious about, solely because I think ‘well they must be there for a reason …’.
Another approach is to have more than one culprit. The obvious suspect turns out to be the evildoer, but they are dismissed at one point because they couldn’t have done it (eg they had an alibi) or their motive collapses. You then reveal that they did do it, but for a different reason and enlisted the help of someone else, either to give them a false alibi or to carry out the deed on their behalf. Lovers of True Crime see this all the time. The woman whose husband is killed whilst she is twenty miles away in a crowded bar, turns out to have been murdered by her lover so that they can live happily ever, after is a typical example.
Just one final thought. I have focused here on the culprit, but what about the unexpected hero? This has to be done with care, to avoid stereotypes and ‘saviour tropes’ (eg the damsel in distress is rescued by the big, handsome man). However, when done well, it can work brilliantly . For example our protagonist luckily avoids danger or has unexpected clues fall into their lap, and it is eventually revealed that they had an unknown helper all along. Especially if the helper is the person you’d least expect to be on their side.
What do you think about character visibility? Do you like the culprit to be hidden in plain sight or a part of the background? As always, feel free to comment here or on social media.
Until next time,
Paul.
If you are a writer with a tip to share, or fancy writing a fictional interview between you and one of your characters, please feel free to email me.
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TuesdayTips164
Block Buster
Ideas To Thwart Writer’s Block
Boo! Spooky Special!
Welcome all, it’s Halloween, so how better to celebrate than a spooky Block Buster – a short exercise to either bust your writer’s block, or just a fun writing challenge to practise your skills?
As writers we are sometimes accused of having over-active imaginations. Today’s exercise involves giving free-reign to our fears and crafting something suitably creepy or scary.
First, choose one of the following story prompts.- It’s the dead of night. The house is empty when you awaken unexpectedly. What was that noise? It sounds like a floorboard creaking!
- You’re standing at the kitchen sink. It’s dark outside. The security lights come on unexpectedly and you see a shadowy figure.
- You’re out shopping. Across the store you lock eyes with a stranger who looks familiar. A person who died many years ago…
- It’s the middle of the night. You live alone or with a partner. You have no children. So why is there the sound of a baby crying …
If none of these prompts grab you, take a look at this webpage from MasterClass.com
Now write a story using that prompt.
Things to consider:- First person or third person? (ie are you the star of the story, or are you writing about a different character?)
- Will it be a horrible gore fest, or are you more interested in a psychological thriller?
- What will the resolution be – is there a straightforward explanation, or is it something more sinister?
- Or will there be no resolution, leaving it up to the reader’s imagination?
Remember the rules:
- Set yourself a time limit.
- Write without stopping, editing or overthinking.
- Write whatever comes to mind and don’t worry if it doesn’t make sense.
- It doesn’t matter if it has nothing to do with the scene that you are stuck on.
If you are a writer with a tip to share, or fancy writing a fictional interview between you and one of your characters, please feel free to email me.
Until next time,
Paul
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TuesdayTips163
Block Buster
Ideas To Thwart Writer’s Block
Spin It Off.Today’s #TuesdayTip is another Block Buster – a short exercise to either bust your writer’s block, or just a fun writing challenge to practise your skills. It follows on from last week’s tip about Spin-off series (#Tip162).
Spin-off TV series are all the rage these days, with original series based on characters or settings from existing film or TV franchises. Marvel’s Loki, Hawkeye and The Falcon and the Winter Soldier all take characters from the Marvel Cinematic Universe (which is itself inspired by the original comic book source material) and give them their own platform. Harlan Coben has written a novel, Win, based on Windsor Horne Lockwood III, a popular supporting character from his Myron Bolitar series. And a damn good read it is too!
Today’s exercise therefore, is to write a short piece based on a minor or secondary character from an existing work. The parameters of this activity are up to you.- Will it be a short story or a character study of a couple of paragraphs?
- How minor is the character? – are they a named, secondary character, or just someone standing in the background?
- Will it be a retelling of an event, or will you write something entirely unrelated eg a day in the life of one of Jabba the Hutt’s musicians?
Remember the rules:
- Set yourself a time limit.
- Write without stopping, editing or overthinking.
- Write whatever comes to mind and don’t worry if it doesn’t make sense.
- It doesn’t matter if it has nothing to do with the scene that you are stuck on.
If you are a writer with a tip to share, or fancy writing a fictional interview between you and one of your characters, please feel free to email me.
Until next time,
Paul
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TuesdayTips162
Returning To The Well.
Spin-off Series.
If you have watched TV in recent years, you have probably noticed the plethora of so-called ‘spin-off series’ – original TV series that take their inspiration from a tiny part of an existing film or TV franchise. Results are mixed, obviously. The Disney corporation has become especially adept at this in recent years, with multiple TV series based on Star Wars or the Marvel Cinematic Universe.
The seed of the new series can vary enormously. Sometimes that link is very explicit, other times less so. For example, the Marvel series Loki centres on Thor’s brother, portrayed several times already in various Marvel film entries, such as the Thor films or The Avengers by Tom Hiddleston. Before then, Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D took a very minor character from the Marvel film series, Agent Coulson, and crafted a show around him that ran for seven years and 136 episodes. Both of these examples (and numerous others besides) often have lots of cameos from other characters in the franchise. Early in its run, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D would often have actors from the film series briefly reprise their role in an episode.
At the other end of the spectrum, the critically-acclaimed Mandalorian series is based, indirectly, on a very briefly seen character in the original Star Wars film trilogy (the armour-clad bounty hunter Bobba Fett). He is only in a couple of scenes in The Empire Strikes Back (Episode V) and Return of the Jedi (Ep VI). His backstory is further fleshed out in the prequel film, Attack of the Clones (Ep II) – of course the twist here is that the Mandalorian in the eponymous TV series is not Bobba Fett, rather a bounty hunter from the same race as Boba Fett. The concept of Bobba Fett led to the exploration of a whole new corner of the Star Wars universe that is familiar in look and feel, and follows the ‘rules’ of that fictional creation, without being heavily reliant on existing characters from the original source material.
Of course, this is not a new phenomenon. Spin-off or tie-in novels from TV and film franchises have been around for decades. I own hundreds of Star Trek novels (and have read even more). The most common are ‘additional episodes’, if you like, of the various Star Trek TV series. I have many dozens of Star Trek: The Next Generation (ST:TNG) books which could easily have been a TV episode. Excitingly, the freedom of the format allows the writers to tell stories that can’t be filmed, either because of expense, limitations in visual effects, or in later years because the actors that portrayed these beloved characters are no longer with us. I also own books that create new characters, set within the Star Trek universe. Peter David’s New Frontier series, which first appeared in the nineties, featured a new starship and entirely original characters. It was unquestionably part of the existing and ongoing ST: TNG universe, with ‘cameos’ from Captain Picard etc, and it followed the ‘rules’ of that universe. As a huge fan of the TV series, when reading the books, my mind’s eye easily conjured up images based on the TV series’ aesthetic.
So, where is this going? As a writer, we are often looking for inspiration, and a spin-off from an existing work can be a great way of creating of original material. You may be fortunate enough to have an existing work of your own that you can expand. For example Harlan Coben has taken characters from his incredibly popular Myron Bolitar series and given them their own novels.
Otherwise an option is to take inspiration from someone else’s creation. Unfortunately, unless you are writing not-for-profit fan fiction, using intellectual property that is still under copyright without permission will likely land you in hot water. Neither Lucasfilm or CBS are going to look kindly on you writing spin-off novels set in the Star Wars or Star Trek universes (please note, I still await the call from Pocket Books to write a Star Trek-based detective novel). Even older franchises can have some limitations – some of the characters from the later Sherlock Holmes books will remain off limits for a few more years. But there are plenty of older, public domain, novels. Dracula and Frankenstein’s monster have been reimagined many times, with other characters from those novels sometimes taking centre stage. The much-lauded crime writer, PD James, continued Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice with her own Death Comes To Pemberley.
Could a spin-off be the inspiration for your writing? What spin-off series do you think work particularly well? What spin-off series would you really love to see?
As always feel free to share here or on social media.
Until next time,
Paul.
If you are a writer with a tip to share, or fancy writing a fictional interview between you and one of your characters, please feel free to email me.
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TuesdayTips161
TV Review:
The Force: Manchester.
Today’s Tuesday Tip is another TV review. This time it’s The Force: Manchester.
There have been several seasons of this fly-on-the-wall policing documentary, dating back to 2015. We have been watching it weekly in repeats on the Pick TV channel, however it is available across several different streaming platforms.
Previously I have reviewed 24 Hours in Police Custody (Tip#129), an occasional series which looks at an individual investigation from 999 call to trial. I then reviewed Night Coppers (Tip#145) which focuses on response police officers doing the night shift in Brighton.
The Force: Manchester again deals with uniformed response officers, but covers day and night shifts across Greater Manchester. Like Night Coppers, this is less about the investigation, more the day-to-day policing and the incidents that police are called to. There is a good mix of roads policing, drugs raids, mass disturbances (including policing volatile football matches), dog searches and domestic disputes.
As always, there is good entertainment to be had in some of the bizarre interactions officers deal with, as well as scenes that will make you feel anger or despair. As a writer, it is again full of useful nuggets of information and little details. What I really like though, is the candid nature of the officers when talking to the camera. One particular roads policing officer is very open about his thoughts regarding bad and dangerous driving. Other officers are openly exasperated at the time wasted by domestic disputes (note: I’m not talking about domestic violence – rather ‘my neighbour keeps on moving my wheelie bin’ etc). As more than one officer observed, there are too many people who are incapable of resolving disagreements in an adult fashion and automatically call the police.
The show is several years old now, so one can only assume that the ongoing budget cuts have made things even worse, especially with the Covid crisis.
Definitely one worth watching.
Have you watched any decent documentaries or fly-on-the-wall series that you would recommend?
As always, feel free to comment here or on social media.
Until next time.
Paul
If you are a writer with a tip to share, or fancy writing a fictional interview between you and one of your characters, please feel free to email me.
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TuesdayTips160
Dualling Narratives.
Using Multiple Timelines.
For this week’s #TuesdayTip, I am looking at stories told in two or more different time frames. There are lots of different versions of this particular narrative device, each with their own strengths, weaknesses and challenges. I have dabbled myself, writing a short story some years ago for a charity anthology, Dark Minds, and I have some other projects on the go 🤫.
The most basic use of this device is to simply have two parallel storylines that are linked in some way, with one of them set earlier than the other. Typically, there is a ‘modern’ story, which bookends the tale, perhaps the protagonist introduces the story, then we see the events that took place earlier, before returning to the modern times.
The film Titanic is a good example of this. After the discovery of the picture in the wreck of the ship, 100-year-old Rose contacts the dive team. She then recounts what happened 85 years previously, which we see as the storyline that forms the bulk of the main narrative, before we finally return to the present where Rose wraps up the story.
This is typically fairly easy to write. There is little crossing-over between the two timelines, so little danger of the reader becoming confused.
A rather more complex version sees the two timelines told in parallel, with frequent switching between the two. This is where it can become more challenging. It is important to remember that books are rarely read in one sitting. Many people will read a few pages at a time, for example in bed, and might take a break. Therefore it is important to ensure that the reader is confident within a few pargraphs of restarting which timeline they are currently reading. You can of course start each chapter with a date and/or time – but what if the reader put the book down after reaching a section break, rather than a chapter break? How will they know which timeline they are currently reading when they pick the book up again?
In some ways, filmmakers have it easier than authors in this respect. In Titanic, the clothing and opulence of a 1912 ocean liner is easily distinguishable from contemporary 1997 and of course Kate Winslet playing a 17-year-old Rose looked different to her modern-day counterpart, played by a heavily made-up 87-year-old Gloria Stuart. The Guy Pearce film, Memento, is able to easily avoid confusion between two different timelines, one played forward and one in reverse (a clever plot device designed to replicate the protagonist’s short-term memory loss and inability to form new memories), by shooting one in black and white and the other in colour.For novelists, such trickery isn’t possible. So how can a reader tell, within a few paragraphs, which storyline they are reading?
The most obvious is simply the events that are taking place. The two timelines may be so different that it is immediately obvious when the story is occurring. But what if that isn’t enough? Can you seed clues in?
Crucially, you don’t want to be explicit. Subtlety is key. You want to give a ‘flavour’ of the time period, rather than screaming ‘this bit is set in 1998’.
For example, imagine a story in which two police investigations take place, a few years apart, with the same detective driving both.
The first thing to do, is to ask yourself what is the same about the two stories (and may thus create confusion) and what is different (and therefore can be used as a marker to differentiate the two).
Here are some quick suggestions:
Characters involved. Perhaps some of the secondary characters change between the two situations? DC Plod wasn’t involved in the first investigation, so when they speak it is obvious that the book is currently focusing on the later investigation.
The weather/season. The first investigation took place in winter, the second in summer. So when a character grabs their thick coat, or grumbles about the aircon not working, it places the story appropriately.
Character evolution. If the timelines are several years apart, how have the characters changed? Have they aged? Is one of them now a parent? Are they bald?
How has society changed? TV and films will take great care to get the correct period detail. A character’s mobile phone will look a lot different in 2010 to 2023. It will also have different fuctions and apps. You can use these differences to subtly set the scene.What are your thoughts on stories set in dual time frames? Have you seen any clever tricks that can help a reader easily place themselves in a particular timeline? As always feel free to share here or on social media.
Until next time,
Paul.
If you are a writer with a tip to share, or fancy writing a fictional interview between you and one of your characters, please feel free to email me.
